We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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