at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
The Olympian is in my bed
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
