Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
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I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
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The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up