Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
