I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Randomize