I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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