i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
