Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
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Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
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I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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