Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(519): View more from Ontario

Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.

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(817): View more from Texas

He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house

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(314): View more from Missouri

i don't want you to think of me as your TA

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(917): View more from New York City

Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(860): View more from Connecticut

hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party

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(816): View more from Missouri

TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.

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(907): View more from Alaska

We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.

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(720): View more from Colorado

Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".

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(352): View more from Florida

what the fuck is wrong with you

(702): View more from Nevada

Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?

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