So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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