just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at about main and main street
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize