also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
