AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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