"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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