Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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