I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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