Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
