'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Randomize
