Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize