My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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