Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
