His pubic hair was longer than his dick
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
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