Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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