i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
