..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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