did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
