Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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