Texts From Last Night

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  (678): View more from Georgia

  There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.

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  (678): There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me. http://tfl.nu/i6y1
  Replies (53) Good night (4436) Bad night (707)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.

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  (617): he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant (617): then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him. http://tfl.nu/q2li
  Replies (6) Good night (858) Bad night (3715)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  had another sex dream about alec baldwin...

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  (828): had another sex dream about alec baldwin... http://tfl.nu/qec0
  Replies (32) Good night (1467) Bad night (4515)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness

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  (513): did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness http://tfl.nu/hxgt
  Replies (70) Good night (928) Bad night (5562)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day

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  (817): Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day http://tfl.nu/cyg4
  Replies (16) Good night (894) Bad night (3578)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.

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  (317): Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor. http://tfl.nu/i4di
  Replies (15) Good night (980) Bad night (2944)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with

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  (212): the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with http://tfl.nu/bllr
  Replies (24) Good night (3408) Bad night (1043)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.

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  (248): like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life. http://tfl.nu/wwre
  Replies (3) Good night (3042) Bad night (991)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.

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  (973): Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality. http://tfl.nu/dmqi
  Replies (9) Good night (2055) Bad night (966)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.

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  (360): Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised. http://tfl.nu/xha6
  Replies (45) Good night (1926) Bad night (3854)
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  (212): View more from New York

  You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.

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  (212): You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne. http://tfl.nu/l5in
  Replies (13) Good night (1925) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends

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  (480): there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends http://tfl.nu/jsju
  Replies (6) Good night (1399) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.

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  (832): She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me. http://tfl.nu/8d60
  Replies (7) Good night (920) Bad night (289)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  What are your plans?

  (1-608): View more from Wisconsin

  Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.

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  (608): What are your plans? (1-608): Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters. http://tfl.nu/04dy
  Replies (1) Good night (757) Bad night (255)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.

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  (541): Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god. http://tfl.nu/ma7j
  Replies (0) Good night (196) Bad night (398)

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