I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize