Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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