then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
