I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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