She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize