you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I will pee on everything he values.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
