okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
