Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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