i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize