I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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