There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
