you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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