Jerry, you need to find god
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
