Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
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