Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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