Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
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