Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(630): View more from Illinois

He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.

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(551): View more from New Jersey

i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(860): View more from Connecticut

My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.

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(478): View more from Georgia

IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?

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(607): View more from New York

Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in

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(406): View more from Montana

Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....

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