my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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