Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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