there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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