i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
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I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Please don't give away my fajitas
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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