is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
