I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I need to sanitize my soul.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
